This is one of the things they teach you at reviewer school. Usually on a Friday afternoon, when everything is old.
The Critic’s Curse on Theatre Makers
“May no-one understand your work.
May no-one appreciate your effort.
May my condemnation be taken at its word.
May audiences stay at home, or prefer elective surgery, to your play.
May you touch no-one, as you will not touch me.
May you move no-one, as you will not move me.
May your audience feel only the dryness of their throats, the hardness of their seats, the passing of time.
May your production be as ephemeral as the melting dew, or the breaking dawn, while my judgement be as eternal and effortless as the ubiquitous electronic screen.
May no-one share your joy, but know only obligation, as I have.
And though you bless all creation with your celebration, may it be only my cold evaluation that remains.”
Veronica Kaye
Theatre Red 
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